Mrs. Fields: A True Revolutionary

You all should be ashamed, you male-chauvinistic consumers you. While Famous Amos and Otis Spunkmeyer and the Keebler Elves’ cookies continue to thrive, Mrs. Fields, the Queen of Cookies, had to declare bankruptcy this week. What the hell is that about? When will you all finally come to the realization that women can bake cookies too?

          Just because Mrs. Fields is a woman does not mean she doesn’t know her way around a kitchen. She can combine butter, flour, baking soda, chocolate chips, and eggs as well as any man, and there’s no reason to believe otherwise. Sure, she might not be able to mix the dough as thoroughly or beat the batter as aggressively, but she can certainly set the timer just the same.

          Women are completely competent bakers, if you only give them the chance. All they need is the same opportunity as men to learn how to work in a kitchen, what ingredients compliment each other, where everything is, how to follow directions and carry out a recipe, and a woman could achieve anything in the kitchen a man could. Maybe even more.

          This is why I firmly believe that women should be allowed to spend more time in the kitchen. So that they can learn all the little culinary tricks that men have been perfecting for centuries now. If women were permitted the same rights to stay in the kitchen as men, it would be a wonder what they could come up with. In no time they’d not only actually be able to create equal cookies to their male counterparts, but maybe even cakes, and muffins, and pies, and elaborate turkey dinners that they slaved over all day.

          I know women in the kitchen is a novel idea, it might seem a little too revolutionary for some, but now is the time for change. As glass ceilings are being cracked all over this great country, why can’t the kitchen be the next place women can conquer? It can be a scary thought for some men to have their wives work in the kitchen, but just think how she must’ve felt that first time she let you take out the trash.

          Mrs. Fields was a symbol of what a woman could accomplish in a kitchen if only given the chance to actually be in one. She was a cookie, and cooking, icon. She was a culinary legend. Every time one walked by that little stand in the mall with the red script writing one was forced to confront what a female baker could accomplish when a female baker was given the opportunity to bake.

          Her cookies were soft, moist, and plump. Her cookies were chock full of chocolate chunks, and nuts, and white chocolate chunks, and macadamia nuts. Her cookies tasted of the future. Her cookies tasted of tomorrow. Her cookies tasted of a time in the not-so-distant future when both sexes were thrown into a bowl, combined with a couple of fresh ingredients, and placed into an oven where they would be baked into a beautiful batch of equality. When women were finally allowed the right of staying, working, being and yes, bitching, while in the kitchen.